Question: I married a divorced woman who is older than me by four years and she has a child. My parents were against our marriage, but I got married without their consent. Now my wife is four months pregnant, I read a lot that it is prohibited to do abortion of fear before poverty. With all my heart I want to see my wife gave birth to a child. But I am afraid - if my parents will be unpleasant with me, my life would be in vain, Allah will punish me. What can I do? (Anonim)
Assalamu Alaikum Wa Rahmatullahi Wa Barakaatuh
The pleasure of the parents has been strongly emphasized in Islam. There are numerous verses in the Qur’an and Prophetic traditions that emphasize the pleasure of the parents.
Now that you have already married this woman and she now carries your child, you have an added responsibility. You have to keep your wife happy and your parents happy and you also have to keep the interests of your child in mind as you will soon be a father. You cannot terminate the marriage merely on account of your parents’ wishes, for this will hurt the feelings of your wife. It is also not permissible for you to even consider abortion in this case as this is not a valid reason for abortion at all.
You should have been conscious about your parent’s displeasure before marrying this woman. Now that you are already married to her, you are responsible for her. It was your actions that put you in this situation so deal with it responsibly. Don’t jeopardize the lives of others now just because you are now suddenly conscious about your parent’s displeasure.
What you should do now is pull yourself together and take care of your wife and maintain your marriage. At the same time, you should also find ways to obtain your parent’s approval and pleasure. Go to them and ask them for forgiveness for disobeying and redeem yourself in their eyes. It might not be that they pardon you immediately, but you should continue trying. Help them to the best of your ability and continue requesting them for their Dua until they finally pardon you. They are your parents and they will eventually pardon you due to their love for you Insha Allah.
Remember that if you are sincere in your efforts, Allah will definitely appreciate it and will not let your efforts go in vain.
And Allah Knows Best.
Mufti Suhail Tarmahomed